Hi, I’m Dave lovely.
I spent 20 years trying to be a good little cog in Corporate America before realizing I could no longer ignore my deeply rooted desire to help people in a more meaningful way.
I’ll always remember a poster I saw at one of my internships, at a program dedicated to working with queer youth - “Be the adult that you didn’t have.”
As a therapist, I am centering my practice in communities that traditionally get a cold or even hostile reception from mental health professionals - kinksters, geeks, furries, queer folk, or anyone with a marginalized identity. I’ll work with you to understand where you’ve been and what you’ve experienced.
We cannot change the past - what has happened will always be what has happened. But we can change what the past means to you - and help you grow larger than the pain and the suffering, until you rediscover joy again, both in the big life achievements and the everyday accomplishments that make up a life.
My Approach
As a social worker, I’m trained in the idea that the most important question to ask a client isn’t “What’s wrong with you?”, but “What’s happened to you?” We’re all a product of our environments and our experiences, and everyone has been through some kind of traumatic experience - life is just too hard and complicated to avoid it!
I always approach a new client in the spirit of unconditional positive regard and curiosity - trying to understand a client’s life both in the here-and-now and as part of a longer journey. We then begin the real work of therapy, which can be difficult and scary! But I’ll be there with you every step of the way.
“Normal” Isn’t
Normal is a figment of statistics. I’ll never judge a client for their hobbies or sexual interests. Nothing is going to be too “weird” for me, within my ethical framework. I’ll meet you where you are, and will never blame your struggles simply on some aspect of who you are.
My values are my life
I identify as kinky, queer, polyamorous, furry, a geek, and neurodivergent. I know what it’s like to be rejected or demeaned by professionals for who I am, and I will never put a client, or a prospective client, through that experience.